Training and Anxiety
The last two weeks have been a bit of a struggle. I'm been struck down with gastro and haven't been able to swim, bike or even run. I've realised just how important training and the community of running and triathlon is to me and how hard it is without it.
I think of living with anxiety as like having my head in a vice. At first the pressure is stimulating and enables me to push myself both as an athlete and Podiatrist. But before long the to-do list, and expectations attached to this, get out of control and suffocate the flow and energy between my brain and body. Trying to manage this is a constant battle - my thoughts say "just add one more thing, you can cope" but I know I can't. It's critical to be able to focus on one thing at a time but this is very hard for me!
Training and being in a group really helps me to stay present. I can focus on one thing and really connect with the activity, I find running and cycling are especially good! I think the need to connect with the outside world and my environment is the reason why I can. Plus it's alot harder to give into distraction when there's no phone or ipad nearby.
Being in a group and being coached really helps as it keeps me accountable and is one less decision to worry about (decision fatigue is a big challenge for me) plus sharing and achieving things with others is a great positive and helps to bring me up!
I'm hoping to get back to training this weekend, looking forward to getting back on track!